Marisa Porter

Discontinued? Unavailable on every shopping site known to US citizens?

How can this be? For four years my pendulum swung between mascara that made my eyes itch and water, and was clumpy and unattractive, and mascara that was around $20. This budget conscious beauty junkie does not want to pay $20 for mascara.

Then one day – after a four year search, Great Big Lashes. By Paula’s Choice.

I loved it. Nate loved it. My readers loved it. It was simplicity and confidence in a bottle.

I owned one bottle ever. It cost $9 and last 7 months. Now it’s gone.

After fishing the discarded bottle out of the trash (and it wasn’t even closed, the wand and bottle were in different places – gross), I realized I couldn’t really wear that, and rushed to Ulta to get the one mascara everyone has been raving about that I could possibly imagine filling my GBL shaped hole – Benefit They’re Real.

I was disappointed. There really was no difference. I could imagine one if I tried really hard, but that is nothing to pay an additional $14 for, and the definition is inferior to GBL.

You might be a beauty junkie if this image makes you tear up:

Or this:

Or this:

No explanation. Not even a “this product has been discontinued.”

Now I will have to go back to buying and returning products, something I’ve done enough of for 6 people for 3 lifetimes I’m sure. I’ve even paid people to return products for me.

When I return the mascara, it will either be because they disappointed me, or I just can’t stomach the price tag.

I will have to return to reading hours of blogs by others to see what they recommend, to feel a lump of hope inside, to buy the mascara, only to apply it and think, “it just doesn’t look like Great Big Lashes.”

Or to get almost excited about a new and probably over-priced mascara, resigning myself to its over-priced-ness, calculating how many months it needs to last to justify its drag on my bank account, only to see the empty bottle of Great Big Lashes lying on my vanity, and feel sick to my stomach. Then I will throw it all back in the orange bag with the receipt and say, “I have to go back to the plaza tomorrow, Nate.”  And I’ll fall asleep dreaming about the money I’ll get back when I make the return, and maybe stay up late trolling all the world’s shopping sites for Great Big Lashes.

Over-dramatizing?

Maybe. But not much.